2 out of 3 ain’t bad, but 3 out of 4 is

My cousin Luke Godin’s memorial was today. He’d been 49 for less than a week when he died last Sunday.

He’s the third of my aunt Joy’s 4 boys to pass away.

His younger brother, Brent, was only 32 when he had a heart attack, fell and hit his head on the curb and died 12 years ago.

His older brother, Earl, was around 42 when he had a heart attack and died in bed 10 years age.

Their youngest brother, Keith, is going to have his heart checked again tomorrow, like he did after Brent died.

Brent’s funeral was the first time I’d seen Luke and Keith in many years and Luke spoke eloquently at the service. I learned some things about Brent that day that I never knew.

Today I learned how little I really knew about my cousins. I didn’t know he was a dad to 20 year old twin boys, Alex and Tony. Or that he used to rock a porn stach, but then again, didn’t we all?

When we were kids we’d see our cousins when they’d stop by our house heading home from visiting my grandparents. My aunt talked quite loudly and I always used to thing of her as crazy, which she wasn’t. Turns out that my uncle Ray was crazy. And the boys; the boys were loud too but it’s only because there were 4 of them. Sadly, no firm memories stand out from those days. I vaguely remember that Keith as the youngest one annoyed me. I remember Brent, who was a little slow, was picked on a lot by his brothers. I know we joined in on that from time to time but don’t remember the actual conversations. But nothing specific about Luke.

Why is it that things that make you feel ashamed stand out in our memories but things that are fun can fade so quickly?

The last time I saw Luke was at my dad’s celebration of life 3 years ago and I barely recognized him. He was having trouble walking around and was in a considerable amount of pain. He’d been injured his at work a while back and walking was hard to do and even sitting wasn’t all that good for long.

From what I heard today, it sounded like the pain he had been in was even worst then 3 years ago but the drugs he took to manage the pain were not so good for his personality. The only good thing for him is at least his pain is gone.

I’m not the least bit religious, nor do I believe in God or an afterlife, but I do hope you are resting in peace Luke.

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